Things That Will Get Your Ass Kicked

  1. Eating my food.
  2. Touching my Food. (Finger F#$king)
  3. Drinking the last of the coffee and not making a new pot (dirty dogging)
  4. Explaining things to me like I am a four-year-old.
  5. Offering me a Bud Light Lime
  6. Needing things explained to you like you are a four-year-old.
  7. Not keeping up with recent additions to the Ass Kicking List.
  8. Wearing sunglasses inside the bar:
    I can’t stand that.  It’s my new pet peeve and everyone does it down here.  WTF?  They aren’t the blues brothers.  Take the damn sunglasses off.  And it’s normally some fat, illiterate, mildly-retarded, middle aged man, with a gold chain hanging down to his knees that scares away all my potential women in the bar.  -BDM